HARRY STYLES may be ONE DIRECTION'S resident ladies man, but there's "one thing" he loves more than women: tattoos. The teenage crooner recently got inked - again.
The singer is now sporting fresh ink on his left wrist and both forearms. Alongside his small padlock, which was tattooed on by singer-songwriter ED SHEERAN, Styles now has two small zigzags, a fish skeleton and the figure "99p."
During an appearance on an Irish late night show this past week, the floppy-haired singer declined to say what the tats meant -- but bandmate Niall Horan quickly replied: "It's a London thing."
"What else did Styles -- and his bandmates -- have done?"
Styles is also sporting a phrase on his left wrist that begins with the words, "I can't." Then, he has the words "Things I can" and "Thing's I can't" scribbled on both forearms. Those tats were reportedly done in Dublin this past week, reports"The Daily Mail."
HARRY STYLES' NEW BACHELOR BAD
8 Photos Just last month Styles was spotted in the parlor chair, showing off a few new tats on his upper left ribcage, including a pair of comedy and tragedy drama masks, a birdcage and the letters "SMCL."
There's some debate among One Direction fans as to the meaning behind "SMCL." Some believe that the letters stand for "Smile more, cry later," while other Directioners think the letters stand for SIMON COWELL, who first signed the group in early 2011 after being formed on "The X Factor. "
Meanwhile, bandmate LOUIS TOMLINSON also flashed some new body art alongside Styles, as he displayed a stick man on the inside of his right forearm.
As the 20-year-old previously announced on Twitter, he and fellow One Direction member LIAM PAYNE also had tattoos done in Dublin. The pair had matching screws inked on their ankles to match ones that both Styles and ZAYN MALIK have already.
Now the only member of One Direction without any ink is Horan, who recently admitted to a pretty embarrassing tattoo mishap.
"So Me and Liam joined the crew yesterday and got two screw tattoo's on our ankles, now we all have it except Niall! Come on @NiallOfficial."
In related One Direction news, the band's latest single, "Live While We're Young," is currently No. 1 on iTunes. 1D's sophomore effort," Take Me Home", drops Nov. 13.
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Credit: pua-celebrities.blogspot.com
It is extremely troublesome to grasp the attitude of men particularly in dating. Each lady would like to date a person who is charming and enticing. However the matter is the way to attract and build him yours forever. Men have their own likes and dislikes and their perception of an ideal dating. Each man needs to own attractive girls for dating. If dating seems to be nice, it might build him take the plunge to establishing a relationship. However some men aren't like that. They like to either have only once dating only for enjoying some moments and that they don't have any plans to urge into a relationship. In such cases, girls ought to watch out and selecting the proper person so far or to determine a relationship. Each man prefers so far SEXY WOMEN.
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* speaking brazenly what's in your mind that bothers is sweet. This can be sensible because it might have an effect on a relationship.
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To conclude, there are numerous sensible points in having free dating online technique to satisfy someone as you'll apprehend the person in well before meeting him or her in real. It's not absolutely safe however as long as you're careful in going to apprehend your partner well and if it helps in an exceedingly relationship, why to stress then.
Origin: art-of-pickup.blogspot.com
"What the hell were they thinking?"
This has been one crazy week, so pardon me while I wander "way" off the reservation. There will be no pontificating in this post, no finger-wagging, tell-it-like-it-is, set-the-record-straight lecture explaining the real nature of life here in Los Angeles, the city America loves to hate. I won't whine about the looming actor's strike, nor carp about the lingering reverberations of the WGA stoppage.
I will, however, discuss the weather.
Why (you might ask) this sudden lack of bile, this absence of heavy irony, this refusal to bite the gilded hand that has fed me for these past thirty years? Has my eternally half-empty philosophical glass suddenly filled to the brim with 100 proof Knob Creek Kentucky Straight Bourbon? Did I win the Mega-Lotto and jet off to some tropical paradise accompanied by a dozen nubile love slaves culled from the casting couches of Hollywood, eager to indulge my every whim?
Sadly, no.
But the Gods of Tinsel Town have indeed deigned to smile upon me. Not the wide, diamond-encrusted, 24 carat grin of Fantasy Land, but an honest smile welcoming me back into the warm embrace of a sit-com - and not one of those nightmare-on-wheels, single-camera comedies, but a real multi-camera show shot in front of a live audience, as God and Desi Arnaz intended.
That job that was jerked out from under me a few weeks ago? It came back. One of set lighting crew left the show for greener pastures, thus opening a slot for me - so with five episodes left on the schedule (four, after last week), I'm back on the regular crew of a sit-com for the first time in three years. True, this chariot will turn into a pumpkin come the end of June, but such is the finite reality of sit-com life. It happens to everybody sooner or later: even the crew of "Back to You" -- the high-octane, star-studded Kelsey Grammar vehicle we all thought/hoped/prayed might lead the Industry back to the Promised Land of multitudinous sit-coms - is suddenly floating belly-up in the pool, roughly seven years ahead of schedule.
It just goes to show, in the immortal words of William Goldman: "Nobody knows anything."
Not that it was an easy week. Monday and Tuesday were typical lighting days for a sit-com - we did our work without unnecessary abuse - but Wednesday's blocking and pre-shoot day spanked us for 12+ hours, most of which were spent doing actual work. This is hardly the death march pace of an episodic show, but homie don't "do" episodics no more... Still, after shoot night, and an unusually long Friday hanging lights on the new swing sets for next week's show (thanks to Monday's holiday, we have just two days to get ready for the next show, rather than three), I was one tired puppy.
But it was a good tired. It's nice to be back.
Meanwhile, the weather went all the way around the bend. Monday was another sweaty ordeal in the Tandoori oven of broiling desert heat, but by Friday, a cold and blustery rain was pelting LA for the first time in weeks. We went from summer to winter in three days. Riding such a meteorological roller coaster is pretty much the norm in other parts of the country, but we're used to more stable (read: boring) weather out here on the west coast.
Then there were the tornadoes...
Granted, these twisters were nothing compared to the lethal vortexes of doom that have already killed dozens of people in the Midwest this spring -- but still, tornadoes in LA? Earthquakes, fires, and an occasional flood are the usual Act 'o God vectors of death and destruction here on the west coast. These are bad enough -- none who live under the tectonic Sword of Damocles here in California could watch the news these last two weeks without an inward shudder. What happened in China will happen here sooner or later - "later" meaning sometime in the next 30 years, according to the recent grim pronouncements of earthquake experts. Granted, California survived the last three quakes (Landers, Northridge, and Loma Prieta) with a couple of hundred dead and a few billion dollars worth of damage - but none of those quakes even reached 7.0 on the Richter scale, nor lasted more than 15 seconds. The monster quake in Szechwan apparently shook for something like three minutes at close to 8.0 -- a magnitude ten times greater for more than ten times longer than anything experienced by a major urban population center in California for the last hundred years.
Despite our stricter building codes and widespread programs to retro-fit older structures, three minutes of that kind of shaking would reduce most of LA and San Francisco to rubble. Our buildings probably wouldn't come down as fast as those in China did, allowing people a better chance to escape, but in the end, the damage would far exceed that done by Hurricane Katrina, over a much wider and more densely populated area. After the ground stopped shaking, a total rebuild of the physical infrastructure would be required. Whatever future Los Angeles and/or San Francisco emerges from that cloud of dust will be nothing like the cities we know today.
It was hard to watch the televised images from China this week, seeing all those weeping parents standing helpless at the edge of a mountain of rubble that had been their children's school, and is now their tomb. If you got through that dry-eyed, you're a better man than I.
Me? I'm just hoping those California earthquake experts are wrong.
Now, about that billboard pictured above...
I've never seen "Sex in the City," HBO's long-running portrayal of the sexual/emotional travails of four 30-something urban women. Not only am I in the wrong demographic for this sort of show, but I don't have HBO. Maybe it was a great show I really should have seen - but I've missed a lot of great shows on HBO, many of which are lined up on my Netflix queue. It's a good bet I'll go to my grave never having experienced the full wit and wisdom of Carrie Bradshaw and her three friends.
Life is a finite endeavor. The banquet may be rich, but choices must be made.
So here comes the movie version of "Sex in the City," and from what I read, female America quivers in anticipation. That's great -- I hope everybody looking forward to this film gets to see it and has a wonderful viewing experience. But judging by the enormous billboard that stared me down while I was stuck in rush-hour traffic coming down Highland Ave the other day, whoever is marketing this film might be taking that audience for granted. Although I never saw the television show, I have seen many photos of S.J.P as Carrie, and she's always looked like an interesting woman: smart, sassy, and sexy - and above all, very human, with all her strengths and frailties etched upon her face.
But this billboard is just awful, depicting the latest incarnation of Carrie Bradshaw as the mutant spawn of some unholy union between a Beluga whale and Medusa -- her enormous shiny pink face buffed, puffed, and botoxed to the max, jutting out from a monstrous mane of hair that looks like a nest of flaming snakes. And then there are those eyes: Stepford orbs of a metallic turquoise hue not found in nature, a color straight from the digital palate of Photoshop. This Carrie Bradshaw does not appear "remotely" human, but rather like some ghastly animatronic simulacrum "imagineered" by armies of brain-dead worker drones in their underground lair deep beneath Disneyland.
I'm no art director or marketing expert, but this is the most unflattering picture of Sarah Jessica Parker I've ever seen.
Maybe it won't matter. Maybe the fans of "Sex" will ignore this horrendous image, and flock "en masse" to theaters everywhere. But man, that is one butt-ugly billboard.
Carrie, they done you wrong...
Source: mark-rayan-pua.blogspot.com
What is your partner's REAL motive for having you around? The answer lies in their words and actions...
Another lovely morning with a big country breakfast, a huge mug of coffee, and a whole bunch of friends trying to find a way to make their lives together better. For me, that's a great way to start a day, pleasure and productivity.
A quick note before we begin today's lesson: One of you sent me a link to an article that is revealing, revolutionary, and for some, downright scary. Entitled "Mommy's Little Secret," it describes, among other things, statistical evidence that 10% of children in the western hemisphere think that their father is someone other than who their biological father really is, if you know what I mean. DNA evidence is causing all manner of revelations of infidelity, and it's so bad that the courts are now trying to figure out when people are bound to tell fathers and "duped dads" (the one who is paying the bills thinking it's for his own child) and when they're not. I strongly recommend you read it this article; even though it is five years old, it's still relevant and accurate.
As for today's lesson, one of your cohorts said this in response to the issue where I talked about men using guilt and pity tactics to try to obtain sex, the article titled "Sex for Pity's Sake," which you can access in the archive if you missed it:
Meet Tanja K.:
In my eyes women who use guilt or pity for sex are pathetic.....my hubby and I have been married for almost 22 years and there's what real married for love partners call give and take....my hubby is like my kids, spoiled to death and well adjusted...2 in college and 2 in grade school, if you get my drift, sex is our way of being one with each other, and trying new thing together, is what makes our marriage so to die for, so if you got out of me somehow that I use guilt or pity, you better find some new info about real women, not this new age "I'll sleep with you if you'll pay for my hair cut, or my college ed"....those are the women that make good men say dumb hurtful things....my hubby has been my prince from day one, if he's guilty of anything it might be that he hasn't taken time to find friends to have fun with, besides me, but then again, neither have I, our kids have made our life busy and full....hope you find a real women w/real moral values....
Tanja
Tanja's beef is with women who prostitute themselves, not honestly as professionals, but as surreptitious gold-diggers; those parasites who land a man to take care of them, give them means to create and maintain babies and/or self-destructive habits, and use guilt, pity, and sex to keep the man engaged and thinking everything is peachy. Gentlemen, I have to agree.
There are many kinds of relationships that can exist between a man and a woman, but this kind, especially in its most extreme variant, the codependent relationship, is the most destructive. One partner sucks the life out of the other and wastes it in destroying themselves, effectively rushing both of them to an early grave. How can you tell if you're in one of these?
It's not that difficult. Indeed, detection is the easy part; accepting the truth and acting upon it is where most people fail.
First, take a look at who is contributing what to the relationship, and how those contributions are being distributed. If you're working your butt off and she (or HE! - it can go both ways, Ladies, as you'll see in my next book) is spending it faster than you can make it on things that you find you secretly resent, such as a lot of extras for her and the kids, like eating out a lot and designer labels on all their clothes while you have holes in your shoes and take a cheese sandwich and store-brand soda to work for lunch, that's a big red flag.
There's no need to keep a detailed score; it will either be equitable because the relationship is committed and tight or completely lop-sided because one partner is using the other, depending entirely on whether the partners truly love each other or one is using the other.
Next, take a look at language. Even the best liars screw up from time to time, usually when they are either too relaxed, too stressed or have had a drink or two and their guard is down. A partner who really loves you will tell you so for no apparent reason, and their body language and actions will confirm it. One who is indeed NEEDING AND USING you and not loving you will say that they love you in order to get you to tell them that you love them; the statement "I love you" is indeed the question, "Do you love me?" - a plea for confirmation that their ploy is still working. When it comes, it sounds forced, like the ritual "I love you" that ends all too many phone conversations with that hint of whining or desperation that makes what should be a profession into an interrogation.
You can also learn a lot from the nature of compliments and explanations that inappropriately follow or replace declarations of love. A woman who says, "I love you because you make me feel safe," is most likely saying that she loves the feeling of being protected, not you; anybody with an alpha personality and a weapon (or a large bank account) could make her feel the same way.
Gentlemen, real women don't need a caretaker any more than real men do. They're "all grown up," strong, independent, intelligent, and sexy, not a clingy, needy, neurotic ball of insecurity looking for someone to blame their entire miserable existence on. Being able to take care of themselves, they want a real man who can take care of himself, to form a true symbiotic - nay, synergistic! - partnership, in which the partners can achieve more together than the sum of what they could achieve separately. Such a woman will enjoy watching you being strong and taking the lead, instead of depending on you to do it, and you'll enjoy doing it with her, instead of resenting the whining and pressure.
If you feel like you're being sucked dry, you're in the wrong relationship. You can assess yourself, your partner, and your relationship, as well as have great contacts to help you get out of a bad relationship and find a great woman if you have to, with the information in "THE Man's Guide to Great Relationships and Marriage." Download your copy at http://www.makingherhappy.com right now, read it, and get things on the right track. If they're already on the right track, use the rest of the book to stoke that attraction boiler and kick things up to the stratosphere where problems just don't happen! The woman in your life can be a ball and chain or a ball of fire, and the choice is entirely yours. Choose well, and choose NOW!
In the meantime, live well, be well, and have a wonderful day!
David Cunningham"Being a man is something to which one should aspire, not something for which he should apologize." --David Cunningham
COUPLE: Quinton "Quint" McCord Chamberlain ">SHOW: GUIDING LIGHT
RANK: 13
PLAYED BY:
"Quint:" Michael Tylo
"Nola:" Lisa Brown
YEARS: 1981-1985, 1996-1997
STORY:
Nola spent a year manipulating Kelly and Morgan (John Wesley Shipp and Kristen Vigard) in an effort to keep them apart even pretending to be pregnant with Kelly's baby. When the truth came out--the baby was Floyd's--Kelly told her off and the entire town of Springfield learned of her deception. Shortly after, Quinton, an archaeologist looking for a new start, came to town and moved into a mansion on Thornway Road. Quint met Nola when he interviewed Nola for a job as a live-in assistant, but it was not love at first sight. She thought he was dark and spooky and he thought she was odd. But Quint fascinated Nola and he became the subject of her vivid fantasy life. Despite their growing attraction something always seemed to stand in their way. But on a trip to St. Croix to search for an artifact known as The Temple of Gold, Quint rescued Nola and they shared their first kiss on the beach. But their happiness was short-lived with the arrival of Qunt's ex, Helen Manzini, followed by Nola being kidnapped by the evil Silas Crocker (Benjamin Hendrickson).
Nola was eventually rescued and Quint declared his love her in the hospital thinking she was asleep (she wasn't). Quint eventually admitted his feelings to Nola face to face but their life remained complicated with Helen living in the mansion with them. Soon Nola learned Quint was hiding another former lover, Rebecca, on the third floor of the mansion. Rebecca schemed to keep them apart lying to Nola about what had transpired with Quint in the past. Eventually Rebecca shot her husband, Samuel Pasquin aka Mark Evans, who fell off a cliff. She jumped off after him to her death. Quint and Nola were now free to be together and became engaged. Nola had discovered that Henry Chamberlain was Quint's biological father and Henry threw them an engagement party (this was the infamous episode were Nola and Vanessa showed up wearing the same dress). Quint and Nola married and a year later their son Anthony James was born (fans voted on the name of the baby). In 1985 they left Springfield when Quint got a job in Tanquir. Nola returned in 1995 and it was eventually revealed Quint had cheated on her. Quint showed up and it seemed like they were going to reunite but the characters were written out with their story in limbo. In GUIDING LIGHT's final week Nola returned and gave Vanessa a gift from both her and Quint implying they were still together.
IMPACT:
Quint and Nola were instant fan favorites who captivated viewers wondering when they would finally get it right all the while enjoying Nola fantasies like "Wuthering Heights" and "Casablanca". Brown and Tylo played the odd couple to perfection.
CBS said at the time of the Kelly/Nola reveal, Lisa Brown and Nola received more hate mail than any other character on the network since Lisa in AS THE WORLD TURNS twenty years earlier. The fact that so many people came to love Nola, and Nola with Quint, is a true testament to the genius of Brown. She was named Best Actress by "Afternoon TV" magazine in 1981 but, sadly and unbelievably, was never nominated for an Emmy for her beloved work at GUIDING LIGHT.
Brown went on to star as Iva in AS THE WORLD TURNS (where she did receive two Emmy noms). Tylo played memorable roles in multiple soaps including ALL MY CHILDREN and THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS. Their reunion on GUIDING LIGHT was cut short when the show said they didn't have enough time to focus on the characters. Thankfully Nola's gift line (see above) in September 2009 gave fans a bit of much-deserved closure.
FROM PATRICK ERWIN (A THOUSAND OTHER WORLDS): 1981 is remembered in soap history as the year of Luke and Laura, but for me and millions of others it was the beginning of Quint and Nola. Their story was only on air for a few short years but their journey, as individuals and as a couple, was magnificent and memorable. It had everything: humor, mystery, romance, love and family.
CLASSIC CLIPS:
- NOLA'S EARLY QUINT FANTASIES
- SILAS KIDNAPS NOLA (1982)
- QUINT AND NOLA'S WEDDING (1983)
- THE BIRTH OF ANTHONY JAMES (1984)
Share your thoughts on Quint and Nola in our "Comments" section below or on our MESSAGE BOARD.
RELATED:
- 50 GREATEST SOAP OPERA ACTORS: THE COMPLETE LIST
- 50 GREATEST SOAP OPERA ACTRESSES: THE COMPLETE LIST
- THE COMPLETE LIST: 25 BIGGEST BLUNDERS IN DAYTIME SOAP OPERA HISTORY
Origin: lay-reports.blogspot.com
Have you been told you're too picky? Those were the words that resulted in a thousand chocolate-bar wrappers when I was searching for a mate. Some told me I would never find what I wanted; I needed to settle, or I'd be single forever.
Yet in my experience, most people's standards aren't too high; they're too "low". If I had to summarize over 60 years of excellent relationship research in just one sentence, that sentence would be: "IF YOU CAN FIND AND BE SOMEONE KIND AND RESPECTFUL, YOUR RELATIONSHIP WILL PROBABLY WORK; AND IF YOU CAN'T, IT WON'T."
Factually speaking, kindness and respect are Must-Haves when you're seeking a partner. Not only do these qualities ensure a happy life; they will eliminate abusers-before you get abused, instead of years later.
An abuser is a man or woman who uses anger, violence, threats, put-downs, money, sex, or anything else to systematically control you. Abusers hurt you, physically and/or emotionally, to keep you under their total power. They say they love, but they don't: They manipulate. They control.
And luckily for you, abusers can't fake kindness or respect for long at all; they're the opposite of the abuser's game plan.
In fact, most don't even try to maintain the facade. Studies of abusers show that they typically begin showing their true colors very soon after meeting a would-be partner. As abuse expert Lundy Bancroft put it, "Disrespect is the soil abuse grows in." Abusers show you that disrespect quickly, so they can feel out whether you'll put up with it and hang in there. "They're testing to see if you're an easy mark for their control. "
They might start off with subtle put-downs of you: "You know, a lot of men wouldn't want to go out with a woman who has a kid, but I figure I'm better than that." Or, "Your stretch marks would put off someone shallower than me, but I still think you're pretty good-looking."
Both of those comments were made to me by a man I stopped dating. I later learned he had been jailed for beating his former wife, whom he'd verbally abused for years. "The comments can be backhanded compliments, but they are intended to pull you down by building the abuser up-and keep you feeling bad about yourself so they won't have competition. "These comments are a test. And had I said "okay" to those tests by continuing to see him, he would have upped the ante. It's what abusers do.
But often, before insulting you, an abuser will test your tolerance by speaking unkindly and disrespectfully about others. Name-calling is common. Sometimes, they'll test you by contrasting you with their ex: "She's such a bitch, not at all like you." It's a compliment-or is it?
And then they eventually show you what they really are, once they think you're hooked and under their power.
Abusers may not be acting consciously. And your disrespectful date may not be an abuser. But hopefully, you'll never know, because your standard is kindness and respect-not abuse! We all have bad days. A test of our character is how we deal with them.
"People who are mean-spirited when they don't get their way, or cruel to those who can't retaliate (animals, children, the waitstaff), or who speak with hatred and disrespect about other people, will eventually mistreat you. "
If you've been abused, that's the abuser's fault and not yours. Once you were in that relationship, you couldn't have done anything to prevent the abuse, and you did not deserve it; the best studies show that abusers abuse no matter how wonderful you are, and no matter how much you try to please them. Their unacceptable behavior is not about you-it's about them and their insatiable need for control.
So nobody deserves abuse; we are all inherently worthy of love and the acts that prove it. But if you want to avoid abuse and have a happy love relationship, kindness and respect are rock-bottom requirements from now on.
"DUANA C. WELCH, PH.D., IS THE AUTHOR OF LOVE FACTUALLY: 10 PROVEN STEPS FROM I WISH TO I DO (2015); THIS IS A PARTIAL EXCERPT. THE BOOK IS AVAILABLE NOW. YOU CAN GET A FREE CHAPTER AND LEARN MORE AT HTTP://WWW.LOVEFACTUALLY.CO"
The post Dangerous Liaisons: How 2 Simple Requirements Will Guard Against Abusers appeared first on eHarmony Advice.
Treating Stress & Burnout - Mindful Power
In this article I will highlight how mindfulness and meditation are related to resilience, self regulation and purpose,- three fundamental pillars to sustain resourcefulness, as well as mental,- emotional,- and spiritual wellbeing. Drawing on research as well as direct personal experience, mindfulness and meditation prove to be of great value to programmes aimed at preventing, as well as healing the effects of overwhelming stress and burnout.
"IN THE SECOND LAST PARAGRAPH OF THIS ARTICLE, YOU ARE DIRECTED TO FREE MINDFULNESS AND MEDITATION RESOURCES."
Studies indicate that mindfulness practices and meditation are known to reduce stress (Davidson, 2010, Malinowski, 2008). With burnout resulting from persistent stress (Cartwright & Cooper, 1996), clearly mindfulness and meditation will be helpful in treating as well as preventing burnout. Burnout has been referred to as a 'soul sickness' (Wright, 2010, p 8.), where one reaches a point of being sick and tired of being sick and tired, but oblivious of any solution. A common aspect of burnout are dysfunctional attitudes and behaviours that are disengaged from the present moment (cited in Dierendonck, Garssen & Visser, 2005). This is similar to what (Brown Kelley, 2005; Meiklejohn "et al"., 2012; Irving, J. A., Dobkin, P. L., Cohen- Katz, Wiley, Capuano, Baker, Mackenzie, Poulin, & Seidman-Carlson, 2006). Mindfulness has also been associated with the enhancement of well-being, since it is known to enable people to disengage from unhealthy, automatic behavioural patterns (Ryan & Deci, 2000). Their view is supported by Brown & Ryan's (2003) research which indicates that higher levels of mindfulness are correlated with the lower level of stress and mood disturbance, and will therefore contribute to improving resilience.
MINDFULNESS IN RELATION TO SELF REGULATION
Bonanno's (2004) research suggests that all human beings with unhampered mental health have an innate capacity for resilience and well-being even while facing adversity (cited Kelley, T, 2005, p. 265). According to Ciarrochi, Chan, Caputi, and Roberts (2001), difficulty identifying feelings is likely to predispose an individual to poorer mental health. Various studies support the idea that an individual with a greater ability to identify their emotions will be able to regulate those emotions better (cited in Barrett, L. F., Gross, J., Christensen, T. C., & Benvenuto, M., 2001, p. 721). Inherent in mindfulness approaches is the ability to adapt and regulate one's thought's, feelings and actions according to the situation (Baliki, Ceha, Apkarian, cited in Niemiec, Rashid, Spinella, 2012). Rather than perceiving mental and emotional states as fixed, the mindful approach identifies their impermanent nature and treats them as transitory phenomena (Kabat-Zinn, 1990; Segal, Williams, Jacobs, T. L., "et al." (2011), research done by Jacobs, T. L., "et al." also indicates that meditation is known to promote a sense of meaning and purpose in life (2011). Their study suggests that meditation may facilitate an expanded assessment of one's life as meaningful, which in turn may influence one's assessment of challenging situations, resulting in improved self regulation and enhanced resilience to stress. This idea is in alignment with former research verifying that the perception of meaning is associated with better stress management (e.g., Okamoto "et al.", 2007). Additional evidence shows that when stressful situations are infused with a purposeful meaning, the result is more adaptive stress responses and better psychological coping (e.g., Bower "et al.", 2008). The link between mindfulness and purpose may offer particular value to burnout treatment programmes, since burnout is associated with a deficit in existential meaning and purpose (Frankl, 1963; L"angle, 1994). A central purpose in a person's life is suggested to influence the thoughts, emotions, and actions of that person, as well as enhance that person's resiliency in in stressful situations (cited in McKnight & Kashdan, 2009).
There are apparently similar outcomes when comparing approaches that are motivated by a strong sense of purpose and those of mindfulness in contrast to no sense of purpose or mindlessness. Comparing the research cited in McKnight common outcomes appear to be: an improved ability to understand and cope with stress, enhanced resilience, more adaptable self regulation, as well as a generally elevated psychological, physical, and social well-being. In addition to considering the complimentary factors that are associated with both purpose and mindfulness, there are attributes of both that are not shared, for example: inherent in purpose is a broader motivational component driving the achievement of goals which support that purpose (McKnight while inherent in mindfulness is nonjudgmental awareness of experiences in the present moment (Kabat-Zinn, 1990), as well as the possibility of insight into the true nature of existence (Olendzki, 2010). These characteristic differences between purpose and mindfulness can also be viewed as complimentary resources that may be supportive in the pursuit of dealing holistically with stress issues and burnout. In their discussion on the attributes of purpose, McKnight Overdurf, 2013). Those who are familiar with the technique to facilitate "peripheral vision" report that it takes only a few minutes to learn, it can be applied in any place at any time of day, and the benefits of using it begin to take effect within a few seconds of applying the technique (reported by NLP course participants). On this basis, "peripheral vision" may be of particular use to busy people who don't have time to formally meditate, or those who are sceptical of Eastern practices, and especially those who might be at risk of being effected by stress or burnout. Furthermore, I have personally found that the establishment of "peripheral vision" serves as a useful expediency to access deeper levels of meditation, and when brought to one's tasks and interactions, it facilitates a mindful approach.
"TWO WAYS TO LEARN "PERIPHERAL VISION" FOR FREE: Watch the video where I teach "peripheral vision" at a live NLP training - HERE. Get your copy of the Cool, Calm ">.
Written by Jevon Dangeli - NLP Trainer ">.
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