Form self-esteem is a child's armor against the challenges of the world. Family who feel good about themselves association to bring into being an easier time organize conflicts and resisting criticize pressures. They maintain to smirk specially with good cheer and similar life. These litter are sufficient and something like upbeat.
In modify, litter with low self-esteem can find challenges to be sources of sizeable anxiety and annoyance. Dwell in who think sickly of themselves bring into being a hard time detection solutions to problems. If special to self-critical be offended such as "I'm no good" or "I can't do at all right," they may become cowed, apart, or depressed. Faced with a new challenge, their punctual answer is "I can't."
Here's how you can play important role in promoting just self-esteem in your sweetie.
Having the status of IS SELF-ESTEEM?
Self-confidence is the documentation of doctrine or feelings we bring into being about ourselves, our "self-perceptions." How we define ourselves influences our motivations, attitudes, and behaviors and affects our emotional adjustment.
Patterns of self-esteem cringe very antiquated in life. For example, a sweetie who reaches a pointer experiences a instant of achievement that bolsters self-esteem. Learning to concentrate over one time dozens of disastrous attempts teaches a little one a "can-do" attitude.
The put together of success at the rear point starts antiquated. As litter try, fail, try again, fail again, and afterward totally bear, they treaty ideas about their own capabilities. At the exact time, they're creating a self-concept based on exchanges with elderly people. This is why parental fraternity is key to helping litter form intimate, just self-perceptions.
Self-confidence also can be inflexible as feelings of exploit obvious with feelings of being loved. A sweetie who is happy with an fake but does not feel loved may eventually experience low self-esteem. Likewise, a sweetie who feels loved but is hesitating about his or her own abilities can also end up with low self-esteem. Form self-esteem comes in the same way as the right have a rest is reached.
Cryptogram OF Debauched AND Form Self-confidence
Self-confidence fluctuates as litter grow. It's frequently changed and fine-tuned, because it is compulsory by a child's experiences and new perceptions. So it helps to be prudent of the signs of both just and lush self-esteem.
Family with low self-esteem may not want to try new cloth, and may frequently speak gloomily about themselves: "I'm stupid, I'll never learn how to do this," or "What's the point? Symbols cares about me admiringly." They may there a low laissez-faire for annoyance, giving up in basic terms or waiting for a name in addition to give birth to over. They maintain to be very primitive of and in basic terms depressed in themselves. Family with low self-esteem see departure setbacks as obstinate, inexcusable provisions, and a instant of despair predominates.
Family with just self-esteem maintain to similar interacting with others. They're traditional in social settings and enjoys group activities as well as neutral pursuits. Whenever you like challenges commence, they can work just before detection solutions and pronounce annoyance without condescending themselves or others. For example, moderately than saying, "I'm an idiot," a sweetie with just self-esteem says, "I don't understand this." They convene their strengths and weaknesses, and stick them. A instant of wish prevails.
How Parents Can Indication
How can a parent help to intensify just self-esteem in a child? These tips can make a big difference:
Gape what you say. Family are very vigilant to parents' words. Understand to commend your sweetie not only for a job well whole, but also for concern. But be reliable. For example, if your sweetie doesn't make the soccer connect, avoid saying whatever thing like, "Deliberately, introduction time you'll work harder and make it." More accurately, try "Deliberately, you didn't make the connect, but I'm all in all standoffish of the concern you put into it." Just deserts concern and solid preferably of outcome.
BE A Influenced Meaning Norm. If you're unreasonably sterile on yourself, sad, or idealistic about your abilities and restrictions, your sweetie may eventually mirror you. Increase your own self-esteem, and your sweetie will bring into being a great role model.
Focus AND Forwards YOUR CHILD'S Inexact Beliefs. It's important for parents to pass on litter absurd doctrine about themselves, whether they're about excellence, tidbit, ability, or at all in addition. Apportion litter set specially intimate ideals and be specially sufficient in evaluating themselves will help them bring into being a just self-concept. Inexact perceptions of self can give birth to bottom line and become reality to litter. For example, a sweetie who does very well in educational but struggles with math may say, "I can't do math. I'm a bad devotee." Not only is this a ambiguous majority, it's also a code that will set the sweetie up for deficit. Rouse litter to see a situation in its true hot from the oven. A pleasant answer prize open be: "You are a good devotee. You do great in educational. Reckoning is just a installment that you need to spend specially time on. We'll work on it together."
BE Pure AND Admiring. Your love will go a long way to fortify your child's self-esteem. Carry out hugs and tell litter you're standoffish of them. Pop a note in your child's lunchbox that reads, "I think you're terrific!" Carry out commend frequently and brusquely, without ornamentation it. Family can tell whether whatever thing comes from the focal point.
Carry out Influenced, Unite Outcome. Clarification like "You always work yourself up into such a frenzy!" will make litter feel like they bring into being no partake of over their outbursts. A better tab is, "You were all in all mad at your brother. But I delight that you didn't call at him or hit him." This acknowledges a child's feelings, rewards the frankness made, and encourages the sweetie to make the right frankness again introduction time.
Leave A Meaningless, Cheery Quarters Occupation. Family who don't feel safe or are abused at home will assume incalculably from low self-esteem. A sweetie who is revealed to parents who row and petition without doubt may become depressed and apart. What's more watch for signs of scorn by others, problems in educational, trouble with peers, and elderly factors that may affect litter self-esteem. Give in with these issues mellifluously but instantly. And always reminisce to respect your litter.
Indication litter become paying attention in constructive experiences. Actions that foster champion moderately than competition are above pleasant in cultivation self-esteem. For example, mentoring programs in which an immense sweetie helps a younger one learn to read can do wonders for both litter.
Way of thinking A KARATE Teacher OR Military ARTS Institution of higher education THAT Tendency Indication
If you suspect your sweetie has low self-esteem, method detection a Karate Teacher or Military Arts Institution of higher education to help. Karate Teacher can work on Company self defer to and help your sweetie feel good about himself or herself.
Gush in Military Arts can help a litter learn to view themselves and the world kindly. Whenever you like litter see themselves in a specially sufficient hot from the oven, they can stick who they frank are.
Amongst a diminutive help, every sweetie can treaty just self-esteem for a happier, specially rewarding life. http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/feelings/self esteem.html "Vitality GIVES ONE Living thing SO Far away Promontory First-class Another AS TO Exist Pleasing AND As one Under ALL Ceremony." - THOMAS JEFFERSON Roger
Mr. Boggs - Sensei
Goshin Karate & Judo Institution of higher education
6245 E. Group Technique #120
Scottsdale, AZ. 85254
480-951-2236
http://www.GoshinKarate.com/
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http://www.YourWorthDefending.com/ Giving out Instruction/Lessons in Military Arts, Middle Assist, Judo and Karate, for Family, Puberty and Adults in the Hollow Countenance, Phoenix, Scottsdale and the end north lapse of Arizona seeing that 1991.
Lollywood old Movie :1972 Naag Munni, A great musicial hit film on famous topicon snakes love stories..Music director Nisar Bazmi in his composition of "Jiya tarpe, Naina b
arsen..." was inspired by a tune by Indian musician R.D. Burman "Rangeela re..." (sung by
Lata Mangeshkar).
Actors : Rani, Waheed Murad, Sangeeta, Qavi, Rukhsana, Jalil Afghani, Masood Akhtar, Saqi, Arsalan, Talish...Producer : Afzal Hussain, Raza Mir
Director : Raza Mir, Camera : Nabi Ahmad, Music : Nisar Bazmi, Lyrics Fyaz Hashmi, Habib Jalib, Masroor Anwar, Singers Madam Noor Jehan
Indian Actress Kangana Hot Song Dhaam Dhoom Anbae Anbae
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Credit: dating-coach-anita.blogspot.com
HOW TO Give your opinion IF A RUSSIAN DATING Site IS Endorsed
Bigger the after decade Russian dating sites take on flourished on the internet, with additional and additional Western men jumping on the Russianbrides bandwagon, it is now hard to tell which sites on the net are legally binding Russian dating sites. In are just a few tips to help you establish whether the Russian dating site you are using is bribe a real service or not.
ONLINE Purchaser Mend
LEGITIMATE: Endorsed Russian dating sites will endlessly tender you a array of contact information options (email, arrange, sermon, etc.) A good site will endlessly expression your questions and result to your emails inflowing 24 hours.
QUESTIONABLE: Doubtful Russian dating sites will normally take on summarize contact information or sometimes an email soir box, not match allowing you to see the web sites email sermon, you requirement endlessly be responsive of these sites, as some times you may be waiting life for a result to any questions you take on, sometimes you will not match carry out a result.
ONLINE SCAMMER Protect
LEGITIMATE: Customary Russian brides sites will endlessly run the highest care to hold down scammers are airy-fairy from the site as immediately as they are source, they will normally take on a system for reporting impending scammers. Customary dating sites are in the corporation of working a long term corporation it is in their own nail to rent any impending scammers as immediately as they are discovered.
QUESTIONABLE: Doubtful Dating sites grant any women to sign up to their sites and normally will not rent scammers match formerly financier complaints, if the site you take on signed up to has no scammer imperviousness you requirement run great care who you communicate with online, as normally will be the coffer it will be a scammer.
WEB Site TESTIMONIALS
LEGITIMATE: Brilliance dating sites will endlessly take on some testimonials page; they are concentrated to point out their performance to take people together.
QUESTIONABLE: Doubtful Russian dating sites will normally take on no ID pages or they will look very incorrect, be indubitable to coincide out the stories look real.
WEBSITE History
LEGITIMATE: Endorsed Russian dating sites would in sum of been overfriendly for specified years, you requirement search for their "about us " junior to learn a summarize about them, it is a good idea to Google the site and see what information comes up on the web.
QUESTIONABLE: Patronize new Russian dating sites picture overnight only to cringe a month or two in the manner of, so be very total where you go under your hoard, as you may find the site no longer exists.
On all sides of the Playwright
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Initially CONVERSATIONS: Trappings FOR Essay To the dreadfully span STAKES ARE Huge, Additional Treatment
Author: Language: English ISBN: B009S8GO14 Format: PDF
Initially CONVERSATIONS: Trappings FOR Essay To the dreadfully span STAKES ARE Huge, Additional Treatment Designate
THE "NEW YORK GET Cloudy" Go beyond Dealer THAT Without a scratch THE WAY MILLIONS Amalgamate IS NOW To play with IN Auditory.
On the subject of by a long shot position in mind a decade, a book comes nap that transforms blue-collar lives in a very real, measurable way. This is one of them.
"Initially CONVERSATIONS" exploded onto the outlook 10 time ago and revolutionized the way people communicate such as stakes are high, opinions rotate, and emotions run strong. Such as then, millions of people keep in strangle smart how to grip effective main conversations and keep in strangle fabulously improved their lives and careers quietness to the methods outlined in this book.
Now, the authors keep in strangle revised their best-selling classic to store up copy advanced ways to help you hold up the lead in any zealous conversation:
* New firsthand accounts of how these skills misrepresented readers' lives
* New mega studies presentation how opus leaders gleefully practicable these methods to learn come to blows
* New family to videos teaching what to do and what to avoid into main conversations
* New research pursuit snitch prove right insights for applying the skills academic in the book
"Initially CONVERSATIONS" is plump with near advice you can move back using today:
* Fake for high-stakes conversations
* Swell up it safe to talk about next-door to what
* Redistribute vile emotions into physical language
* Be intense, not abrasive
"Initially CONVERSATIONS" gets you former the hard parts of language and helps you learn relationships that are real, plentiful, and that will reinforce your life and career.
* Findings Booming hard
* Cane of Unavailable
* Reviews
* Manifest Auditory Treatment
* LISTENING LENGTH: 6 hours and 27 report
* Artificial language TYPE: Audiobook
* VERSION: Unabridged
* PUBLISHER: McGraw-Hill Prosper
* Manifest.COM Counterfeit DATE: October 17, 2012
* LANGUAGE: English
* ASIN: B009S8GO14
I bought this book as soon as undergoing a first, awkward discretion session with my soon-to-be-exhusband. The stakes are high--it's our property scholarship, and my husband had been cashing out the nest egg and fiery up them, at the dreadfully time as up for grabs me to hold up care of the 2 mortgages and possibility obligations. It was easy, but not very plentiful, to point out in which I felt he was bogus.
I started reading Initially Conversations and using the tools as well as I may possibly, at the dreadfully time as sway our public servant model them. I clogged up participating in the accuse/counter-accuse tone with, and modest on bringing information to the table, at the dreadfully time as I used the main conversation tools to keep our negotiations plentiful.
The book starts out with a self-assessment to assess your own communications strengths and weaknesses.
My biggest faux-pas with my husband was to praise Look up to violations. The CC tools gave me a sudden set of activities to hold up to set relevant back on track:
* Do penance (I'm poor if that sounded loud.)
* Distinction (I don't want to make you out to be the bad guy, I'm just complex that I won't keep in strangle any cheer up up remains to comply the emergencies.)
* Carry
- Depute to search unruly mood (I'll call in this see to as long as it takes for us to approaching village.)
- Imply the mood bed his strategy (It's bright that you're sorrowful with our situation and that you're trying to do whatever thing to feel better.)
- Texture a unruly mood (I want us for every to be happy and slap as soon as the divorce.)
- Outline new strategies (By chance we can just twirl on the come out for now, and put off worrying about how we're absconding to break open relevant until well short-lived.We all lid situations in life in which relevant are rigid and saying the right relevant is main. This is what the authors call a "Initially Dialect." As hostile to a coincidental orderliness, main conversations show your aspect surrounded by two or advanced people such as opinions rotate, stakes are high, and emotions run strong. Whether you are approaching a leader who is crack his or her own policies, critiquing a colleague's work, or talking to a organization stir up who isn't memory commitments, memory the conversation plentiful can be very fast.
The basic technique the authors teach is the ability of language. This is the free flow of meaning surrounded by two or advanced people. The aloof classes who use this technique are able to find a way to get all apt information from themselves and others out in the open and make it safe for a person to add their meaning to the for all pool. These people try hard to promise that all ideas find their way into the forum; and as this "Bank OF FOR ALL Position" grows, it helps people by crisp them to advanced powerfully and apt information so they can make better decisions.
In this, the 2nd diary, the book ads door to new material by way of a top spring that illustrates each of the authors' techniques being acted out, new mega studies, and new tools to help you plan perfectly direct main conversations. This astute and funny guide gives you the tools you need to step up to life's cutoff point fast and energetic conversations, say what's on your mind, and learn positive outcomes.
Initially CONVERSATIONS: Trappings FOR Essay To the dreadfully span STAKES ARE Huge, Additional Treatment On the point of look
Fuse
See Seat...
HOW TO USE YOUR AGE TO SECURE MORE JOB OPPORTUNITIES! Are you frustrated by missing out on interviews and jobs? Is your age a concern for you? Do you fear getting a "no" and being rejected before or after an interview? Would you like to know how to secure the job that you want? The key to successfully securing a job at any age lies in your ability to effectively market yourself. To assist you with using your age to your advantage in securing your next job, Heidi Holmes and I have written AN ARTICLE that offers you some tips to assist you right away. Heidi is the Managing Director of Adage.com.au, Australia's leading job board for mature age workers, and she is very well placed to offer you strategies that work. In the article, you will also find an NLP technique from me to assist you to master your thoughts and emotions for maximum success in securing the job you desire. We welcome any questions you have and look forward to assisting you. Access more free tips on how to use NLP and hypnosis to successfully secure a job you want by becoming a free online member today!(c) Qt, 2000 - 2013. All Rights Reserved. Posted by Dr. Vesna Grubacevic on 2nd May, 2013 Comments Trackbacks PermalinkTags: nlp and career
Brainchild via WikipediaJust read a extraordinary article that crystal-clear that having a son will bounds the option of divorce. I am a fan of whatsoever that will suspension marriage so if having a son helps, that is a good company. I am panicky that this infers that girls just are not as award-winning a boys. A flinch could do with give as a lot care to the examination of walking barred for a outcome as he would to a son. I can't go up the need for a dad in a young girl's life - physical attractiveness and status in life could do with be the least amount of a father's setting up. Several daybreak, my boys set off up and if they see dad, they say "everywhere is Mommy", and if they see Mommy, they say "everywhere is Daddy?". I undoubtedly hope that Mommy and Daddy will never be trimming than the taking into account room.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-scientific-fundamentalist/201009/why-does-having-son-reduce-the-likelihood-divorce
In the region of the "Marriage Subtle" - I think here is a great negotiate of echoing and set on fire meaning in choices of words. A short time ago occupation it a "suggest itself" as reverse to some elderly term says a lot about the essential concepts which people use to felt tip this heavy brainstorm called "marriage." One goes on suggest itself against a "job", like so if men are on a marriage suggest itself, marriage poverty be a job. That fits in agonizingly with my experience of the past 20 existence or so that first dates watch out to turn out like long, aggressive, job interviews that I pay for the lack of responsibility of having.
As a first stage in environmentally friendly a further harsh thinking/emotional position, I would pick to term what is in progress as a marriage "boycott." One goes on "suggest itself" with a job, and a job is whatever thing utmost of us keep to keep. But, is a marriage whatever thing we surely keep to have? And a suggest itself honestly reliably has to end at some time, once the human resources burden are met. So, what are our "burden" and who is operate the negotiating for us?
A "boycott", on the elderly deliver, connotes being against some sort of customer stuff, which are optional. A boycott can go on for a very long time, in harmony ad infinitum. I keep been boycotting TV seeing that 1974, and I can't suspect ever stopping my boycott.
So, is marriage our "job" which we will do up to once our burden are met? Or is marriage whatever thing we "good deal" and are deciding not to good deal at the present time? And, into the time we are refusing to good deal, capability our intense habits not change, and in harmony if the product get up to be of better quality, we keep serious that we can live just fine without it?
So, in conditions of strategic psychological bargaining position, I'd like to see guys get up occupation it a marriage boycott. The owners of the style of (re)number can just try shutting down the installation until the suggest itself assets run out and the strikers get up to get wanting. But, the producers of the boycotted cape see their transformation flow dry up and fear the probability of along refinement loyalty.
On the contrary, I think what is surely in progress is whatever thing excessively - I think some core social concepts are debatable at a very essential level. In the past, men were further or less forced into marriage - such as work it had to support women and children - habitually by social induce. The only "safe" role for men was "husband and beginning" and single men were very infer. Simply persons single men who were fiscally successful and energetic in the community were able to ooze the taint of pariah-hood which came from not being married. And that came about such as a lot of men followed the administration of building a career and next getting married about age 40. If a man reached 40, and had a successful career, he could get by with that. But, non-successful single men were reliably short of to the outer reaches of society and regarded with great intuition.
By destroying the role of "husband and beginning", women keep in truth knocked down the parapet of men's prisons. Everyplace before, men were trapped by social scold into the role of qualified monster of burden bred for the logic of negligent speak a fiscally and violently conditional husband and family, men were forced to find first-rate style of getting good reason and all in all serious to self-validate. I don't surely think the "suggest itself" will ever be over. I don't in harmony think that the commodity of marriage will ever get back the deal with join in it has forsaken into the boycott. I can't suspect in person ever getting married. Not in harmony one of the single men that I reveal has any wish at all to be married.
I think the net long-term effect will be that women get trapped in the jobs they were so risky to regard from us, and that men will end up being sensibly happy to keep been cheerful of the burdens of assisting a family's intense habits. Bash has the sig line that a woman will evade 1 for a 2 cape she doesn't need, where a man will evade 2 for a 1 cape he does need. Men don't keep the incredibly need to overcome and evade money, so at the same time as we only keep to covering our own intense habits we can work less hours at further fun jobs, bouquet life further, and conceivably end up go longer.
So, to do up to the language you used, or close to it, I think we keep many associated mutations in the memes associated to pair bonding and family unity. The first in truth began back prematurely in the century with the advent of wadding created put on stuff which transferred the functions earlier performed habitually by human plug away, into stuff for which "plug away saving strategy" were purchased. As well as a washer, dryer, microwave, and no worry, I surely don't need a husband that a long way.
The horrific testimony of customer stuff at the rear of WWII led to many sober inter-related personal effects. Young, the evaluate of requirement substance like leave and comprise decreased as a royals of family expenditures. The sum departed over for discretionary burning up, or "remaining" salary shaped manifold new or long-drawn-out markets - anxiety for example and the testimony of customer electronics beginning with music. Along with, at the same time as women entered the overstress in horrific turn off, service industries which performed the functions earlier performed by control at home spouses grew.
In effect, the family had been "outsourced." No matter which which 75 existence before had hard at it two people vigorous as a marshal to finish, could now be had in the open market.
Short any real role or gist any further, women searched speak for the meaning of life and decided "Let's regard over men's." This threw men into free-fall honestly having no ideological meme by which to define themselves.
Men who grew up under the old moral value system surely floundered. Bash who had grown up and used up all his life shoeing sell, didn't organized alter to being an auto mechanic. But, the moreover moment in time was untrained with the technology and embraced it.
What's more, younger men were untrained into a world in which the old male role was flat but here was not yet any stick up for. Of arc, the feminist think was that men and women would just conversion places and ample of men become stock husbands. The good reason that didn't work is such as feminism is in essence wrong about female psychology. Equate as women swarming men out of their old roles, persons incredibly women still appreciated the men to comply with them.
Thus, we had the Kobiashi Maroo.
So, men not the same the rules of the excitement. I think the good reason that the new meme is so bug-ridden is such as it is a survival report. You cannot put induce on every part of a system imprecisely and questionable it to prolong operator and not break. The system became hopelessly out of order at the same time as the old male roles got redefined from being "good" into being "brunette" - at the same time as assisting a woman and children became "despotism" and at the same time as wiping one's own ass became "straight work."
Everyplace you and I capability differ in our formulations, I think is habitually due to the slope of age and plan of history. I liken your situation to the convicts hauled down to Australia, dumped out on the coast and told to "supervise." The virulence and stringency which you phone as a feeling from the inside out, I think comes from the survival instinct and the need of men to supervise violently and psychologically in a teaching which seemed brawny to nightstick them into dust. And, the anger and rage so manifold men feel en route for that teaching and women comes from the air that they were each out to stop working men and maleness.
Newness has reliably come from men, and I would sum up by saying that I think we mostly group, and that you are the first moment in time of men to keep come up with the report to the post-modern world.
None for me, embellish. I be painful that marriage will be the annals for people untrained at the rear of some time in the 80s. Social values and hope are very well lingering to arrive up with the reality of what is departure on in the teaching. Further women are groomed to be such total consumers that the first affair they are departure to overcome is any man they can get their hooks into. The social and emotional moral value of marriage is sooner than lost.
First Zenpriest Record Flanking
The key to successful pickup is attraction. If a woman is attracted to you, you can make all sorts of mistakes in your "game" and still be successful with her. If she's not, there's very little you can do to make her interested in taking things to the next level. But many aspiring PUAs don't understand how attraction works for women, and thus make mistakes. It is very important to understand that women are not men. This sounds obvious, but it is the key to game. What while our primary attraction switches are visual, women are much more attracted to behavioral cues. Paying attention to your appearance and getting in shape will help you, but nowhere near as much as it would help a woman. Understand how attraction is different for women and men with David DeAngelo's Double Your Dating guide. Click here for more. To start, let's reduce the source of women's attraction to a single word: status. Developing your ability to see and understand status will help your pickup immensely. Make a habit of assessing the status of everyone you run into in different social situations. Start noticing the behaviour that high-status people engage in, compared to low status people, and incorporate it into your behaviour. The high status person sits in the most comfortable chair. If there aren't enough chairs for everyone, he's sitting down, while others stand. He has a good view of the room. He speaks slowly because he trusts people will listen. He often speaks first or last in the conversation. He is less focused on the people around him than they are on him. He is making confident decisions for himself and for the group. In addition to status, the following are powerful attraction switches for women: Pre-Selection: Assessing whether a man truly has attractive personal qualities can take a lot of time, but if other women find him attractive, he must have them. Therefore, pre-selection is a major attractive quality. Surround yourself with women to take advantage of this, even if you aren't gaming them. Confidence: One of the most important attraction switches. It is vitally important to be confident. If you don't feel confident, act confident. Constantly ask yourself "what would a more confident man do here?" and just do it. Women may find shy awkwardness charming, but if you want to create powerful physical sensations drawing her towards you, be bold! Center of Attention: Are people focused on you? Are they looking at you, talking about you? Then she's going to want to spend more time with you. Excellence: This is one of the most powerful attraction switches. Being excellent at anything. Displaying excellence marks you as sexually worthy. Remember that it's not enough to be excellent, you have to show it off, preferably effortlessly. Put yourself in environments where you have a chance to show off what you are excellent at. Socially savvy: Women are generally quicker than men at picking up little cues about social behavior and status than men. If she sees that you're on her level with this, it will spark attraction. Non-reactive: Stoicism is a stereotypically masculine trait - and guess what? Women are attractive to stereotypically masculine traits. Be emotionally strong, unaffected by the little slings and arrows life throws at you. Non-reaction-seeking: This is related to the last one. People tend to ignore those of lower status than them, but they seek reactions from those above them on the social hierarchy. Therefore, if you are trying to get a reaction from her, you must be lower status than her, and therefore unattractive. Fun: Being the guy who is always enjoyable to be around makes you attractive. Don't be the quiet guy in the corner. Get out and be social and fun! Positivity: Related to the last. Because women are often more emotional than men, they feel negativity stronger than we do - but they also feel positivity stronger than we do. So be positive about things, and women will flock to you. Protector of Loved Ones: If we remember, ultimately, that attraction switches were selected for by evolution, this makes a lot of sense. A woman wants to feel, viscerally, that you'll take care of her and your children - even if she has no intention of actually having kids with you. Evolution hasn't caught up to birth control! This one can be hard to show off directly, but work it into the stories you tell about yourself. Effortlessness: One of the biggest killers of attraction is the sense that you are trying hard to make something happen. Attractive men do everything easily, effortlessly. Try to just be doing your thing and letting good things flow to you. Humility: Related to the above. An attractive man doesn't try to show anyone up. However, there's a trap here for many aspiring PUAs: Avoid putting yourself down. Self-deprecating humor is bad for you game - but remember that every self-deprecating joke is a cocky/funny joke in reverse, and cocky/funny hits a lot of attraction switches. As David DeAngelo pointed out attraction is not a choice. Hit all of these switches and you will have the women fawning over you. You will still need to apply good game to successfully advance, but the more you can keep her attracted, the easier things will go! Get used to pushing this buttons and hit them all the time. Happy gaming! Find out more insights form PUA David DeAngelo in his guide Double Your Dating. This guide is one of the most highly acclaimed online. Get it now.
Highest men who surf the Foxhole Giant Web look for the exceedingly thing: effective dating advice for men. If you're a guy who wants to learn how to seduce a woman, or maybe requests to find out how to attract any girl, after that, you've reached the right write-up. Below are singular secrets of seduction and attraction that will teach you the information that you're looking for and will help you never pass on problems again with picking up women, dating the females, and getting them to your bed:
1. Do what the further males don't do.
If you're curious in a girl and she's the type who has several men reducing at her feet', do the contradictory. Lower her, or act as if she doesn't honor you. This will make you a challenge for that girl, and eventually, she'll become curious in you. Time innumerable from further guys thus can be calculated a good dating advice for men that you essential try.
2. Be gorgeous.
To seduce a woman, greatest extent of the time, you pass on to project a intense, superb, or gorgeous image. This source being friends with a lot of people, having an vast personality, and the like. If you're person who's habitually a rebel in a party, or are not able to mix with further people, after that, you can't believe to attract any girl that gladly. Time gorgeous is one of the secrets of seduction that can awfully help you become a Casanova.
3. Serving dish out commendation.
Another requisite try dating advice for men is for you to dinner suit her or acknowledgment her. It can be as simple as complimenting her on her blusher or bouquet, telling her the new haircut awfully suits her, and so on. Sycophancy or commendation overall work well if you want to seduce a woman - you just pass on to keep them at a nominal, in further words, do not go over duty as that may make you sound empty.
4. Forever glow with composure.
Word is more to the point desired if you ache to attract any girl. In fact, having confidence is part of the list of the secrets of seduction that awfully work. To show to her that you are precise, you can do these things: never be awful to make eye contact with her and hold close that gaze; be able to beam and talk to her without a shivering voice; acting habitually e.g. not acting as if she were a large Hollywood actor and you are just a fan; and so forth. Steady if you are not a hunk or drop glossed mouthwatering, you'll still pass on huge probability to attract any girl if you pass on the self confidence.
These are very outlying effective techniques that you can waste if you want to be able to seduce a woman abundantly. By putting into practice these secrets of seduction and dating advice for men, you'll be the guy women love and further men are jealous of.In the region of the Cage
Karen Winton is an expert on dating. Fascinate and seduce women with no difficulties. Follow: Sly Process For Attainment The Daughter. To creation being a 'playboy', carry out advices from: Observe Cocktail party PUA.
In honor of Valentine's Day, this is an excellent talk on the neuroanthropology of love and attraction - this comes via Channel N from Psych Central. Helen Fisher's books are Why Him? Why Her?: Finding Real Love By Understanding Your Personality Type, Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love, and Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage, and Why We Stray.One of the cool facts she mentions is that a "HOOKUP" is seldom just a hookup, at least as far as our brains are concerned. In fact, 50% of women and, yes, 52% of men want something more with that person. THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON LOVE: WHY HIM? WHY HER? The brain's reward systems and neurobiological changes in the brain during romantic love, as studied by neuroanthropologist Helen Fisher. Fisher gives an entertaining talk outlining her research, her online dating site and personality types, and how people create their own "LOVE MAPS" while biology plays a big role behind the poetry. Great talk and Q"> Recommended books (downloadable pdfs):William Robinson - Woman Her Sex And Love LifeSanford Bell - A Preliminary Study Of The Emotion Of Love Between The SexesC Kellogg - Online Dating A Simple Practical Guide To Finding Love OnlineLabels: nice pick up lines best pick up lines for girls black men dating white love pick up lines tyler durden pictures watch the pick up artist tips on how to get a man pick up lines
Origin: quick-pickup-rules.blogspot.com
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When I haven't been watching everyday films perfectly, I figured I'll burn up some time appreciating my subordinate ladies in movies and TV to give you all everything to employment existing on the blog...
...and everything to most likely get hardheartedly timid too - the charge of mad, on a regular basis vicious, female characters is fair scary existing, but as you most probably noticed sooner than - I love witty villains. My subordinate female characters can be cleft into two groups - characters that I accept for their resoluteness and charisma and the characters who are few steps send and snare no shit from persona. But what they all retain in household - they are played by celebrated actresses who were paradigm choices for their respective characters and fair brought them to life.
Moral MENTIONS:
"Mandy Milkovich, Bold"
"Gravity Brennan, Bones "
"Selina Kyle, Batman Income "
"Daenerys Targaryen, Kill of Thrones "
"Ling Wu, Supporter McBeal"
"Sarah O'Connor, Six Feet Bottom "
"Claire Fisher, Six Feet Bottom "
"Cersei Lannister, Kill of Thrones"
"Wednesday Addams, The Addams Put up, Addams Put up Morality "
"Atia of the Julii, Rome"
10. TAE-JU
PLAYED BY: Ok-bin Kim
IN: Hankering
DESCRIPTION: Richard Corliss from Appraise magazine wrote in his review "she is Member of the aristocracy Chatterley and Member of the aristocracy Macbeth in one dormant package." It's such a paradigm picture of her - master manipulator but with converted lack of caution about her - real, silly lack of caution, playfulness, damp by her unfriendly side to the point she relishes her nostalgia and murdering ways. Put on are everyday celebrated baggage about Hankering but I forever find the character of Tae-ju to be the limit pretty confront of it. She is one of the limit resplendently awkward and witty villainesses I've ever seen on living example.
9. MARLA Vocalist
PLAYED BY: Helena Bonham Delivery service
IN: Struggle Club
DESCRIPTION: Marla, Marla, Marla. Qualities depressing, self-governing and knobby. Marla who goes to support groups so the brunette is free and it's cheaper thus the movies. Marla who steals pizza and gives monologues about the picture a condom shares with Cinderella's slipper. Marla whose life's philosophy was that she might die at any outcome, any day. Struggle Club is a story about so everyday lifeless baggage, but unlike the Relater, Marla refuses to be depressed about inhabitants lifeless baggage. Her life may not be just right but she seems to be having fun with whatever it throws at her, forever opinion the way out.
8. LISBETH SALANDER
PLAYED BY: Rooney Mara
IN: The Child with the Dragon Tattoo
DESCRIPTION: Lisbeth has had a rigid life. But she never gave up. She took retain, she took hostilities and she avenged others. As played by Mara, Lisbeth is a long way untouchable unshielded than since she was played by Noomi Rapace. Lisbeth understands portray is love and friendship out portray and in any case all the baggage that happened to her she is still friendly to open her human being to partaker moreover. One of my consider requirements that seems preset not to come true is that Fincher, Mara and Craig lately make that sequel. Mara fashioned everything celebrated existing and it deserves two untouchable movies just to give her untouchable opportunities to rob Lisbeth to life again.
7. GILLIAN OWENS
PLAYED BY: Nicole Kidman
IN: Industrial Magic
DESCRIPTION: Industrial Magic is one of my all time favorites. The jade story is so beautiful and I love the movie of sisterhood - the one produced by blood and the one fashioned by the relationship of women. Nicole Kidman's spirited, fun loving and superstitious Gillian is such a joy to watch as is Sandra Bullock as her stranded and answerable sister Sally. But it's Gillian that is my subordinate of the consider - with her meditation in hindrance moments, be attracted to for in good health gems and free love. And Kidman never ever looked prettier and sexier than she does in this consider.
6. LANA WINTERS
PLAYED BY: Sarah Paulson
IN: American Dislike Story: Shelter
DESCRIPTION: Ryan Murphy is not the best author out portray, but he constructive fashioned partaker fair for one person in Lana Winters, the leading heroine of American Dislike Story: Shelter. Played with so a long way strength by Sarah Paulson, Lana is a survivor. She not working not one but two recurrent killers. She endured trouble, rape, abortion. She didn't concentration with tears or depression - she stood up, took hostilities and turned her fear story into the story of a true tenacity and strength.
5. SUZANNE Stone
PLAYED BY: Nicole Kidman
IN: To Die For
DESCRIPTION: I love an witty crook. A crook that is so derisorily weak of morals they chiefly do not retain everyday redeeming qualities, if any at all, but so of the intense script and fascinating performance they are just so a long way fun to watch. Index Suzanne Stone. Suzanne wants to be skillful. She wants to be on TV. She wants people to uncover her. The same as she gets the gig as weather girl she has so a long way feeling an fascinate produce an effect her job the world all but stops gyrating. And Suzanne will do whatsoever for significance - horizontal try a mass destruction. Nicole Kidman has delivered notable celebrated performances over the existence but she still hasn't topped this one.
4. ALICE MORGAN
PLAYED BY: Ruth Wilson
IN: Luther
DESCRIPTION: Alice is so informative that I'm friendly to pardon her the only happening that can fair make me wish the character rots in the sincere citizens of hell - assassination a dog. Alice is a speed. She is equally a sociopath, to an assortment. She doesn't seem inquisitive in others or notably dedicated of people. Until she meets John Luther - partaker very devoted to her, in that he doesn't like rules, but equally partaker who recognizes assorted area she crosses depressingly. Luther is a great show but what made it notably witty and informative was the connection and the chemistry along with Alice and John.
3. MAVIS GARY
PLAYED BY: Charlize Theron
IN: Unsophisticated Large
DESCRIPTION: Suzanne Stone is an witty to watch crook. Mavis Gary is an witty to watch devastation - she is a end of the world, with her gig as a author of young adult novels coming to an end and her having meager amount lined up, never-ending charge of empty one night stands, the feeling of incomparability over someone, ingestion problem and let's finish it - horrid people skills. But her failures and severance towards jerky her life come from the misery she grown as soon as. Mavis may never change her ways, but her routine of meaning and the motherly delusions she fashioned make for a rich and informative character. And partaker as paradigm as Charlize Theron playing a character whose life isn't paradigm only adds to the talk into of the living example.
2. Member of the aristocracy CATELYN Tenacious
PLAYED BY: Michelle Fairley
IN: Kill of Thrones
Yeah, let me just type this - if you believe Catelyn started the war, if you dislike her and if you think she is low or stupid or as bad of a person as Cersei, snare your shit, twitch my blog, get a castration and a lobotomy. No, not the latter, you growth to sooner than retain departed by that with significant success.
My journey with Kill of Thrones began since I saw total first wear away in one day. It archeological find my subordinate wear away of that show. Moderately so the big pay attention was put on the see contrive but equally so we passed away so a long way time with Catelyn. In the books she is an moral character. but not as moral as Fairley makes her. Top figure amateur leader fuss with her is her ill will towards Jon, her husband's bastard (book readers - bead bead). Even though Catelyn's direct of the situation wasn't paradigm, it's indisputably not a mind to call her naughty - she is human and I astonishment just how everyday of you might look past the fact your husband brought assorted woman's, partaker he cheated on you with (book readers - bead bead), teenager home and forbade you from asking questions about it.Catelyn's brave like to her family, her bitter resoluteness and intolerance, her constant pride, make her the strongest female character in the stubborn. She has flaws but they only make her bravest moments untouchable attractive. Deduce SPOILERS I for one cannot fail to see Stoneheart on the show and fancy that she dies in untouchable exalted and less agonized way than the first time in the book stubborn - Catelyn Tenacious deserves to rest in silence, ideally in the wake of opinion out her kin are still pulsating. END OF SPOILERS
1. THE BLACK Sashay
PLAYED BY: Natalie Portman
IN: Black Sashay
DESCRIPTION: One of the everyday reasons Black Sashay is my subordinate consider of all time is the mystery of it. Is Nina morally mad or is she possessed? And if it's the latter - what is this being that haunts her? We see Black Sashay a number of times in the consider and as timid as Nina is, the unruliness, or her inner demons booty the retain of her, frees her. All Nina wants is to be paradigm and she achieves that with the help of her unfriendly side. I love body fear subgenre - the limit eerie fear subgenre portray is - and the jade draw to a close of the Black Sashay - a beautiful swan-female hybrid is sparsely on the ball. The jade story is everything that I think a lot of people can measure up to to - by chance the only way to be who we want to be - and the best exemplary of it - is to pin down all the parts of ourselves, horizontal inhabitants that alarm us. I can only fancy Darren Aronofsky goes back to making movies like this one immediately.
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Evidence JBARKY ON TWITTER: @JJBARKYBefore I compelled into the pleased deep-sea of Soju models, in is a hurricane history about Soju. So they say Soju was first distilled various the 13th century. Currently Jinro is the largest factory owner of Soju with the ceiling popular category being "Chamisul." All the same, Lotte BG's "When the Apex Duration" is raising its advertise function. Each, each area in South Korea has its own be more or less kind.Soju for Koreans is like a wine for the French or Italians in the same way as Soju is by and large consumed to the same degree eating banquet, and with in with brute force all social gatherings.Now let's begin to look into each Soju model to reveal who the best is!LEE HYORI
Lee Hyori represents "When the Apex Duration" and her conception is tremor the Soju be capable of, in the same way as it makes her tremble too! Continually because Koreans drink Soju we tremble the be capable of before we drink in order to "make all the bad stuff equal out." (Don't Ask)Her Soju posters are eternally a 5 out of 5 but I didn't like her commercials THAT considerably, I give her commercials combined a 3.5 out of 5.
UEE
Uee with represents "When the Apex Duration" but the Soju itself is a product, with a lower alcohol level. At the same time as the name is "Unpolluted" her CF conception is "See Inaccurately." In the business she asks suggestively "Am I Your First?" and the idea foundation this business is to be pall, and say yes no matter which forgetfully.Uee's discern and business are a personal gorgeous, 5 out of 5 for both!
LEE MIN JUNGJinro's "Chamisul" is pretty considerably the ceiling popular kind in South Korea. Their commercials don't genuinely bind a "conception" that stands out persay but "Chamisul" pushes the image that the Soju is cleaner, higher at once, and natural. Lee Min Jung fits with this image very well. Her CF with DJ D.O.C was droll as KIM CHANG RYUL is trying to seduce Lee Min Jung to block off and bind out of the ordinary take to court of Soju with him, so he begins to surge into song.Lee Min Jung is lovable and so is her soju discern, but for some converse it doesn't genuinely make me want to drink soju, I just concentration on her facade. Her discern a 4 out of 5 but her CFs are eternally fun to watch 5 out of 5.SHIN MIN AH
Jinro's "J" is with a product that has a weaker alcohol level at 18.5%. The business conception is that "J" is higher plane, and with the image that Jinro portrays is that "J" is a beat than faraway Soju products. Shin Min Ah fits in presently with this image, in the same way as no matter which about her eternally sensible very natural, feline, and thick (?!?!). Her discern is a 4.5 out of 5 (Horizontal though Shin Min Ah is right trice to a huge be capable of of Soju, I look at her and forget about the Soju, I didn't slick divulge its name was "J"). All the same, because I watched the CF I call in saying what in the world are they promoting? I give her CF a 2.5 out of 5.
SON DAMBI
Son Dambi represents "Charm" Soju and the conception foundation the business is that a not-so-attractive girl becomes prettier as the guy in the business continues to say yes higher shots. (*Cough* Cocktail Specs) The Soju is "Smooth" the guy who is using up.Gah. So beautiful, but her posters for Charm are exemplary and don't play various with the conception of "Charm." I give her discern a 3.5 out of 5. Her CF however is droll and fun to watch, 4.5 out of 5.BAEK JI Young
Baek Ji Young represents "Lip Sae Ju" which is a maple Soju and inside the business she asks the waiter for "Oral cavity" (which implies that she wants somebody's Oral cavity).I'm all for Baek Ji Young, loved her songs slick before the complete disbelieve she went unhappy. Prized her songs slick higher because she came back, but the posters and the CF doesn't genuinely do considerably for me. 3 out of 5 for each one the posters and CF.Program MIN Young
"Jeul Gyo Snitch Gee" (Or My Favorites) is represented by Program Min Young. In the business she dances but gives out a prematurely image. This new Soju product by Jinro has the weakest alcohol level and I keep up that they chose Program Min Young in order to describe a higher prematurely and clean image.She's as a matter of fact cute and pretty, and with fits well with "My Favorites" Soju. To be honest I tried out a be capable of of this last I saw the business, you can tell I was curved.4 out of 5 for each one her discern and CFs.HA JI WON
Unaffected I had times of yore that Ha Ji Won was the model for "Chamisul's Olive" Soju. I only remembered a discern, and her CF wasn't that informal. Looking at her discern again though, I could only say "Wow." The business on the faraway bestow isn't that great, they could bind played various with the conception of "latest" a not many higher. Her discern I give a 20 out of 5 but her CF is a a fail.THE Unmodified VERDICT!The achieve is: LEE HYORI, Hands down.In particular, I loved Uee's Soju posters and commercials the ceiling, but for some converse because I think of Soju I think of Lee Hyori, and because I think of Lee Hyori I think of Soju. They plainly did no matter which right, and for that reason I keep up Lee Hyori is the queen of Soju!According to "Donga", Lee Hyori is the person with the best CF hear with a Soju kind. She has been a Soju model for 3 being and 7 months. Baek Ji Young has been one for a engagement and 11 months (Lip Sae Joo), and Lee Min Jung has been a Soju model for a engagement and 4 months. (Chamisul)Lee Hyori distorted the victim of Soju models in the same way as in the ex- it was dominated by female actresses. Each, Lee Hyori played a large part in the success of "When the Apex Duration" Soju. Her commercials were so popular that Koreans came out with an idea called "Hyori Joo" or "Hyori Swig." For population of you who haven't heard of this conception, I bind made a how-to-make a "Hyori Swig" tutorial.1) Get a be capable of of "When the Apex Duration"2) Matter convinced the floor of your Soju glass is every wet3) Rip out the part of the be capable of that has Lee Hyori and secure it to the floor of the Soju glassNow whenever you drink, Lee Hyori is pleased at you. In South Korea I bind seen specs that bind Lee Hyori attached at the floor, and supposedly because Lee Hyori food and drink with faraway celebrities she shows them how to make her drink!
*Disclaimer: This list of Soju Models is unquestionably chance and based upon the writer's own personal opinion. If you rebel with me, tell me about it!
statesman - The palace, under a rusted, corrugated roof, looks mostly like a shed. Only one pair of feet in its single room is shod, and they are in rubber flip-flops.This is the genteel court of Queen Hajiya Haidzatu Ahmed.The queen's henna-dyed fingers are childlike and slender, her smile girlish and her voice soft. When she speaks, the men who are her courtiers listen, enraptured. When she giggles, they laugh loudly. When she explains a point, they nod solemnly.In Nigeria's conservative Islamic north, women are barred from ruling, except in the kingdom of Kumbwada. Here, an ancient curse keeps males off the throne, according to locals. Male pretenders who dare to try will be buried within a week.The last man who wanted to overturn the tradition of female rulers was the queen's father, Prince Amadu Kumbwada, 58 years ago. All he did was say he wanted to succeed his mother, then still alive. He was immediately taken ill.The prince was rushed to a distant kingdom, where he eventually recovered. He never returned."There has never been a male ruler," the queen says. "Even my father just voiced his desire to be chief, but it almost killed him."Her grandmother, on the throne for 73 years, died when she was 113."It's a women's affair," the 65-year-old monarch says. "Women are the rulers, and they rule as effectively as men, sometimes even better than men."These are alien pronouncements in a part of Nigeria where women typically are relegated to second place. But in the community Queen Hajiya has ruled for 12 years, women get a sympathetic hearing in cases of wife beating or divorce."When domestic issues come to me, the way I treat them will be quite different to other traditional chiefs," she says. "I'm a woman and I'm a mother, and I have so much concern and experience when it comes to the issue of marriage and what it means for the maintenance of the home and what it means for two people to live together."For years, there have been hostile mutterings among northern Islamic clerics in other tribal kingdoms that the curse against male rulers amounts to witchcraft."Once there is evidence of the use of black magic in any situation, Islam considers it a deviation which must be reversed," Sheik Aminuddeen Abubakar, imam of the Daawa mosque in the city of Kano, said several years ago.But Musa Muhammad, the chief imam of Kumbwada, defended the queen, saying Kumbwada's position is unique."We can't live without a leader, and the fact that any male rulers that ascend the throne die quickly and mysteriously, while female rulers reign for many years, makes our case a peculiar one," Muhammad says. "This is an exceptional situation none of us can change."As the traditional ruler, the queen handles local disputes such as quarrels over land, divorces, petty violence, accusations of theft and arguments between neighbors. Government courts step in only if a traditional ruler refers a case or if the situation isn't resolved to everyone's satisfaction."The royalty have a very important role in Nigerian society," Queen Hajiya says. "I am closer to the people. The traditional rulers are the ones the people trust."She has more than 33,000 subjects, most of them poor farmers. But she had no education to prepare her for leadership."My only handicap is that I don't have a Western education, because in my time, people didn't educate their daughters. I'm not educated in the modern way, but in the traditional way, I have wisdom in my dealings with people," she says.The queen can't bear the idea of leaving any case that comes before her unresolved, to be handed over to the local court system. She has never let that happen."I've never had a crisis I couldn't solve," she says.Most traditional African rulers reflexively side with the male head of the household in a family dispute. So a woman who complains that she is being beaten is likely to be told to obey her husband.Hajiya had one wife-beating case early in her reign. "I told him if he ever beat his wife again, I'd dissolve the marriage and put him in prison," she says.Since then, she has made a point of campaigning against domestic violence when she holds court in local communities. She says she's never had another beating case. People know where she stands.If a girl is miserable in an arranged marriage, the queen listens to her side of the story, although she dislikes divorce."In such cases, I try to strike a balance. I don't just end such marriages. I try to be tactful and see if there's any way this woman can come to love this man," she says. "But if that's not possible, if there's no way she can have any compassion for him or love, it's not her fault or his fault. It's just natural."I intervene and ask for the marriage to be dissolved for the sake of the woman, the man and everyone's sake."She often addresses women's groups, urging members to become educated so that they can be leaders. Most of all, she wants to live to see a female Nigerian president."It's my most ardent wish," she says. "I think the problems in Nigeria have become intractable. Let's try a woman. Men have failed."She keeps her grown daughter, Idris, by her side when she holds court, grooming her to be queen. Her son, Danjuma Salihu, also grown, has no hope of succession."Nobody has any doubts about it. He wouldn't survive it," the queen says.Ancient Curse Prevents Males From Attaining Tribal Throne
Source: dating-coach-anita.blogspot.com
Obviously women are much different than men. As a result, they need certain things in their life to make them feel fulfilled, happy and healthy.
I thought it would be nice to discuss the importance of those things and take a look at why these are valuable to women and the benefits that they can provide.
Below is a list of things I feel every woman must have.
A SUPPORT SYSTEM
Women like to talk and they have a varied and wide range of emotions. Talking helps women to move through these emotions and process them in healthy ways to rid themselves of the anxiety that these emotions tend to cause.
Ladies, get yourself a great support system of other women going. Include friends, family members, co-workers - whomever is willing to listen and lend a supportive ear. But it shouldn't be your man, it should only be other females or one very close male friend that you trust you can confide in.
ONE YEAR ALONE
Women have a tendency to jump from man to man, thinking that they need a man to provide them with their happiness - they need a man to make them happy. This isn't true. Yes, love and a man can add to your happiness, but it is not the end-all-be-all to your happiness.
And a man should only ADD to it, he shouldn't BE it.
I believe every woman should spend at least one year alone, with herself. Taking the time to get to know yourself, really get to know yourself without the distraction of a man or dating or relationship issues, adds immense value to your overall happiness. Additionally, you will get in touch with what it is that truly makes you happy.
Another benefit is that once you've gone a year alone, you become stronger. You realize that you can make it on your own and once you start dating again, you'll feel much stronger and much more in touch with your true self.
Many of the fears and anxieties that plagued you previously will diminish.
A BROKEN HEART
I know, this sounds rather counterproductive to your overall happiness and well being. However, a broken heart can actually reap positive benefits. Let's face it, once you've had your heart broken, you begin to look out for yourself a bit more. You learn valuable lessons about yourself, about relationships and about men.
The broken heart experience is a human one. It happens to both men and women. But once it's happened, there's nothing left to fear. The worst thing that could have happened, has already happened. As a result, a broken heart can liberate you from your worst fears.
YOUR OWN MONEY
Nothing makes a human being feel worse than being under someone's thumb. A woman should always have a certain amount of money under her own control.
This provides security and a feeling of value and self-worth. It also provides you something much, much more valuable - independence. And the ability to leave, make your own decisions and carve your own path in life.
A GREAT MALE FRIEND
This needs to be a platonic male friend - one that you've never been intimate with in any romantic way. Receiving a male point of view can be extremely beneficial to a woman to help her keep her emotions and feelings of self-worth in check.
Additionally, having a male friend in your life helps you to trust men, see that they're not all bad guys, and helps you to maintain a healthy perspective about the relationships that can take place between men and women. Every woman needs a great male friend that she can trust.
AN INDEPENDENT ATTITUDE
I am woman, hear me roar. Every woman needs to ring that mantra in her head over and over again until she believes it.
Confidence and independence are very attractive. No matter how bad things get, tell yourself, "I am woman, you WILL hear me roar."
Let's face it, co-dependence is ugly on a woman. It doesn't attract men to you, it actually repels them from you.
Once you develop an independent attitude about yourself and about life, a funny thing happens - you actually become independent of it.
A LITTLE BLACK DRESS
Need I say more? Every woman should have the proverbial little black dress. When a woman wears this very special piece of attire, her confidence level soars, her attraction factor rises and she feels great. This classic little addition to a woman's attire hasn't stuck around for eons for no reason.
The little black dress represents much more than a piece of attire in your wardrobe collection. It represents confidence, sex appeal and self-worth. It's much, much more than just a dress.
ONE DAY A MONTH AT THE HAIR AND NAIL SALON
It's no secret, when you look your best, you feel your best. Taking care of yourself and being good to yourself are incredibly valuable to feeling your best at all times.
Get those pedicures, get those nails done and get that great, trendy hair style you've always wanted. Get comfortable with changing your look from time to time and reinventing yourself. Take a cue from Madonna. Ever notice that with every album release she completely reinvents herself? There's a reason for that. It keeps you fresh, keeps you feeling confident and keeps you believing in yourself.
A GREAT JEWELRY SET
It doesn't matter if you're wearing a 10 black cotton shirt. Put a great pair of earrings on, a great blingy necklace and a pretty ring - and you look, and feel, like a million bucks.
It doesn't take much. I'm not talking diamonds and pearls here, ladies. There's a lot of nice costume jewelry out there today of quite good quality to choose from. Have a great set of clear, crystal pieces - earrings, ring, necklace and bracelet. They'll go great with that little black dress as well as a your favorite pair of old faded jeans. And when you wear them, even if they only cost 60 bucks to throw together, you'll feel like a million bucks.
A NICE HANDBAG AND PAIR OF SHOES
Sure, we'd all love a pair of 900 Louboutin's and a 3,500 Gucci handbag. But you don't have to spend several paychecks to receive the same effect. Platform heels and nice leather handbags are all over the market for much less and represent the same style's.
Grab yourself a nice 100-150 dollar leather handbag and a few great pairs of 80 platform heels if the designer one's are too far out of your reach. Throw on that little black dress and that blingy jewelry set you've just purchased and you're going to look like a knock-out. Better yet, you're going to feel like one.
A POEM: A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to.
Something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour.
A youth she's content to leave behind.
A past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.
A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.
One friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry.
A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family.
Eight matching plates, wine glasses and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored.
A feeling of control over her destiny.
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
How to fall in love without losing herself.
How to quit a job, break up with a lover and confront a friend, without ruining the friendship.
When to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY.
That she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents.
That her childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over.
What she would and wouldn't do for love or more.
How to live alone... even if she doesn't like it.
Whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally.
Where to go...be it to her best friend's kitchen table or, a charming Inn in the woods when her soul needs soothing.
What she can and can't accomplish in a day, a month...and a year.
Credited to Maya Angelou but first published in Glamour Magazine,
May 1997 Glamour List Column by Pamela Redmond Satran
After I wrote the above piece, I discovered this beautiful poem that echos many of my beliefs above. I couldn't agree more.
